|Affiliations||United Assassins Association (Ranked 3rd)|
|First appearance||No More Heroes 2|
|Battle theme||Shoegazer Watched the Stars|
|Voice actor||Paul Eiding|
Captain Vladimir is the 3rd ranked assassin in No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle.
He is a Russian cosmonaut who still believes he is in space. He thinks the Soviet Union still exists, and upon seeing Travis, he takes him for an American enemy, immediately attacking him.
After being defeated by Travis, Captain Vladimir realizes that he's back on planet Earth and passes away happily. Travis, feeling sympathy for his opponent, convinces Sylvia to leave his remains alone.
Vladimir's space suit generates a powerful force barrier in front of him. Due to this, he can only be attacked from behind, thankfully he is often unable to turn in time to avoid such attacks, especially when firing his laser. Captain Vladimir floats slightly over the ground using his cosmonaut's suit, and is deceptively fast, able to cover long distances in the blink of an eye, sometimes via teleportation.
He appears to use telekinesis somehow, lifting large boulders from the ground to throw them at Travis (since he has a cosmic theme, this may be a "reverse gravity" attack). He can also fire a laser from the visor of his helmet. This laser comes in two variations - the yellow one lasts for a very short period and is weak, while the bigger blue one, which he starts using later in the battle, is much more powerful and sweeps a wide area.
He fights with the assistance of a laser-firing satellite, named Volk (Wolf in Russian), which regularly unleashes a rain of small laser blasts upon the battlefield from orbit. Vladimir can also use a powerful attack for which he floats into the sky while a thin blue beam is fired down from Volk. This beam then quickly expands to become huge, turning a large area into an instant death zone.
- His voice actor, Paul Eiding, also voices Million Gunman. He's also known for the role of Roy Campbell from the Metal Gear Solid series.
- Captain Vladimir is similar to Speed Buster, in that they are the oldest assassins in their respective games, are both ranked third and use massive laser cannons.
- He is the 6th battle to not have blood.
- It has been speculated by some fans that Captain Vladimir is a ghost, due to him having "survived" for so long with no sustenance, wielding some abilities that appear supernatural, and perishing as soon as he finds peace (when he realizes he has returned to Earth).
|No More Heroes 2|
|Characters||Bishop Shidux · Cat Jeane · Dr. Naomi · Henry Cooldown · Mask de Uh · Mimmy · Ryan · Sylvia Christel · Takashi Miike · Talbot and Weller|
|Assassins||Travis Touchdown · Shinobu · Skelter Helter · Nathan Copeland · Charlie Macdonald · Kimmy Howell · Matt Helms · Cloe Walsh · Dr. Letz Shake · Million Gunman · New Destroyman · Ryuji · Margaret Moonlight · Captain Vladimir · Alice Twilight · Jasper Batt Jr.|
|Locations||Iron Claw Point · Destroy University · Santa Destroy Bank · Destroy Stadium · Destroy Resort · Motel "NO MORE HEROES" · Naomi's Lab · Ryan's Gym|
|Settlements||Santa Destroy, California · Akashic Point|
|Weapons||Beam Katana · Three Girl Rhumba's Sword · Earthquake Maker · Vosmir · Shapeshifting boombox · Le Croissant du Angel|
|Robots||Santa Death Parade · Glastonbury|